We know for a fact that just because you don’t like cooking a certain type of food doesn’t mean you don’t like the food – it only means that the process is rather too stressful/long for you and even though you would do it once in a while for yourself or for a loved one, you don’t appreciate the process, right?
In that light, people need to know that because some women rant about their child delivery/post-delivery madness does not mean they do not love the child or children.
So, back to the gist.
How come nobody ever tells you how crazy your life gets immediately you have a child. I mean, not that you don’t know, but no one explains how suddenly it falls on you the minute you are out of the labor room/theater.
It’s like you realize all of a sudden what you have done and have no clue whatsoever, despite reading every day of your pregnant life or asking several of your friends.
….it just builds up:
- OMG! I have a child! (Anxiety/undefined joy)
- I need to feed him/her, but I’m not even lactating yet and I read that they need to take nothing but breastmilk. (Fear)
- Oh! No! The doctor has ordered the nurse to feed the child with formula; I’m a bad mother already! Can’t even feed my child. (Sad)
- Why is everyone correcting how I do one thing or the other- I can’t act right as a mom should. (Disappointed)
- Why are there so many people visiting… my baby needs some space. (Cranky)
- Why isn’t my husband not paying his 100% attention to me- why does he have to bother about baby dedication, feeding family members or even the baby? (Abandoned)
- Why is everyone telling me to do different things- I’m not even sure if all I read is true and won’t get my baby hurt… (Crying)
- Why is the doctor or nurse or family or friend, carrying my baby so carelessly- you need to be gentle; don’t you know the baby is like an egg and can easily break? (Angry)
- Why is there dust on the road- my baby might be sick… (Worried)
I can go on and on about how wild the emotions run and how every bit of it is felt intensely and on some occasions can’t even define what was being felt.
Besides, you might also begin to doubt yourself as a mother and because of the several stories you have heard, you want to be with the baby 24/7 because you don’t want him/her hurt, yet you need to rest as much as you can.
In conclusion, for first-time mothers, I think the first week is always the craziest especially if you had a caesarean session or an episiotomy, but once you go past the first few weeks, you would laugh at it all.
If you are reading this as a new mom; Please relax! You will be fine and your baby is fine.
And to all unsolicited advisers and untrained pediatricians dishing out corrections and advises to new moms- Please, if she doesn’t ask you and it’s not a life/death matter, keep it to yourself.
Hugs and kisses your way…
Photo Credit: Clare Fisher Photography